Edd’s MANtra: Lessons from Susan

Dagnabbit, the wifey scooped me on Susan Boyle. That’s what I get for messin’ around in Wal-Mart all morning instead of writing.

Know what I hate about Wal-Mart? The greeters. I have great love and respect for the seniors of our community, but Wal-Mart greeters always look at me like I smell like old sauerkraut.

It’s OK, I didn’t want one of those stupid smiley stickers anyway.

And speaking of the older generation, I wanted to chime in on Ms. Boyle’s big showing on Britain’s Got Talent. I knew something was up when everyone posted video of her on their Facebook pages. I just figured it was a clip of a woman falling down a flight of stairs or smearing snot on food at a pizza place. But oh no, when I checked the video out the only thing I could say was:

Ms. Doubtfire can BLOW!

Immediately she’s become the talk of the town, everyone is prattling on about how we shouldn’t judge a book by its cover and suddenly Susan is the next big thing.

Which got me to thinking – this would NEVER happen in the world of urban music.

Why, you ask? Because urban music can be the most shallow form of entertainment on Earth. There is no way a 40-something lady would break through. NO WAY.

Last week my brother-in-law was telling me that his new favorite singer/rapper is a guy named Drake (picture Lil Wayne with a dash of Bobby Valentino). He pronounced this guy the “new” best rapper alive.

And y’all know me – I promptly pointed out about 275 rappers who are better than this guy, with Jay-Z and Nas at the top of the list. His reply was, “Jay-Z and Nas are old news.”

I don’t know if it’s because urban music caters to a younger audience, but once an artist hits a certain age, they’re suddenly obsolete. Now granted, some veterans like LL Cool J have passed their primes but most still have gas in the tank. I’d rather hear a 38-year-old Ghostface than a 23-year-old Yung Berg.

Ancient rock artists like the Eagles still tour and rake in millions. In hip hop, guys like the Wu-Tang Clan have to use cell phones to record their music videos because record companies won’t give ’em a fair shake. If an artist is not under 20 and rail-thin, they get “demoted” to the oldies station.

I fear that close-mindedness will prohibit urban music from finding THEIR Susan Boyle.

Who cares if Madea wants to rap? If she can flow, I say give her a chance.



  1. All this from someone who suffered oxygen deprivation as an infant!


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