By the time you read this, the wifey and I will be enjoying a week of relaxation in Birmingham, Ala. And not a moment too soon, because I was ready to go on a Chaka Zulu-like rampage through my office building.
In preparation for the six-hour road trip, I decided to cobble together a mixtape of old songs. I was in the mood to hear some of those banging songs from my youth, you know, the joints from junior high. I downloaded TLC’s “Baby Baby Baby,” and while listening to it I was shocked to come to this realization:
T-Boz can’t sing.
Don’t get me wrong, that didn’t ruin the enjoyment of the song. But I, in my warped middle school mind, considered T-Boz to be a pretty good vocalist. Imagine my surprise when I heard Oscar the Grouch with emphysema.
Nostalgia is a dangerous thing. It has a way of twisting your mind to think that something that was pretty bad was actually pretty good. Think about, were those pizzas you ate for lunch in school really that good? You know, the rectangular ones with the square pepperoni? Was the Real World always embarrassing and cringe-worthy? Were Cross Colour clothes EVER attractive?
Oh, don’t front. Ladies, you used to think THESE FOOLS were sex symbols:
But wouldn’t it be fun to go back to those innocent days? That’s why I admire our children. While working with my youth group at church, I always marvel at their cluelessness. While I have no desire to mix flaming hot Cheetos with my ice cream, maybe we can take a cue from them. Sure, they don’t see Lil Wayne as the anorexic Predator that he is, but they have fun listening to his music. And yeah, they’ll blindly run into four lanes of traffic to get a 99 cent Nerf football and not think about the consequences, but hey, they got the ball, right?
It’s easy to consider such behavior dumb, but I think it’s dumb legions of girls were in love with effeminate boys dressed like pirates.
What I’m saying is that in our world filled with economic hopelessness and depression and sucky music, I admire the innocence of a child. Even when they don’t realize that their favorite female singer sounds like James Earl Jones.