I know it’s all the rage with the young’ns but I haven’t really been drawn to it. You’re just essentially posting Facebook status updates – I can do that on Facebook.
Still, I’ve been trying to give it the ol’ college try. Or to be more accurate, the ol’ GED try. But I just can’t get excited about Twitter because it is essentially The Land of Justin Bieber.
If you don’t know this Canadian pop singer, I bet you know his name – especially if you know any teen girls or happen to frequent Twitter. The thing is infested with tweets like “Justin is sooooooooo hot!”
You might be surprised that a hater like me can’t say anything bad about the guy. He seems like a nice kid and he’s a decent singer. I don’t actually believe he’s 16 though – more like 11 – but besides being a liar I think he’s a nice guy.
Oops, there I go hating again.
Anyway, Justin got me wondering – why doesn’t hip hop and R&B have nice, young role models? The last nice young kid we had was this guy:
Yes, the 1970s.
Growing up, we might not have had any nice guys for the girls too swoon over, but we had rowdy boys who corrupted a generation by making them wear their clothes backward! Step backward in time with me.
Jermaine Dupri discovered Chris “Mack Daddy” Kelly and Chris “Daddy Mack” Smith in 1991. This was the beginning of JD’s creepy trend of hanging around little kids (young Usher, Bow Wow…). JD produced their debut, Totally Krossed Out, in 1992, which sold four million copies thanks to their hit single, “Jump.”
Why yes, I have that on my iPod, thank you very much.
The duo became megastars – video games, movie and TV roles – thanks in part to their shtick of wearing their clothes backward. My school instituted a No Kris-Kross rule – kids would be suspended for wearing their clothes incorrectly. Today’s schools should institute a similar rule for sagging skinny jeans.
JD decided to keep the momentum going, dropping Da Bomb the following year. “Alright” was moderately successful and despite the album going platinum their star-power was quickly starting to fade.
In 1996, they reinvented themselves as a couple of ghetto Lotharios on Young, Rich & Dangerous. Bet you can guess how that worked out for them. On the bright side, their stylist was no longer Helen Keller. I must admit to owning this album and although I haven’t listened to it since 2pac roamed the earth I remember it being pretty decent. “Tonite’s Tha Night” isn’t too bad. They look like a couple of bobbleheads bopping around in that video, though.
That marked the end of Kris Kross. I guess JD found younger kids to play around with.
I couldn’t find much on the whereabouts of Smith, other than he recorded an album a couple of years ago but couldn’t get anyone to release it.
But Kelly? Oh lord, check this out:
Get that brother a doo rag! According to an interview he conducted last year he doesn’t have cancer, but hair loss from alopecia.
Should they come back: Why? To wear skinny jeans backward? They had their day. I’d rather listen to Justin Bieber.