Edd’s MANtra: R.I.P. MySpace, 2003-2008

It seems that the mighty MySpace has gone the way of Soulja Boy’s career – the graveyard.

About three years ago, the wife pleaded for me to join MySpace. I didn’t know anything about MySpace so therefore I automatically hated it. I’m a crotchety old man like that. She wouldn’t hear of it and told me that it was loads of fun – she even created my page for me! I begrudgingly started to play around with it and 135 friends later I was hooked.

The best thing about MySpace is it allowed me to reconnect with dozens of old friends. Since I moved away from home literally days after graduation I had lost contact with a ton of people. And thanks to MySpace many of those relationships were rekindled. Plus, I was able to keep tabs on the kids in my youth group – just to make sure the freakiness was kept to a minimum.

But over the past six months, I’ve noticed that fewer and fewer of my peeps are online.

What’s going on?

It seems like everyone is moving over to Facebook.

Ugh. Facebook. Why does everyone like it so? Like MySpace, the wife forced me to get a Facebook account. But unlike MySpace, I never had much fun with it. Maybe it’s because the majority of my “friends” there are merely acquaintances or people from high school I barely liked. Maybe it’s because the applications are totally confusing – I nearly deleted my profile trying to add that music gizmo. Or maybe it’s because the “games” suck. Wow, I got attacked by a virtual ninja. Who made up that junk?

Now, I realize MySpace has its faults. MySpace always looks really disheveled and half the time you can’t even log on to the thing. And I won’t even mention the propositions I get from the MySpace Prostitutes. I don’t know if women get them but we men are always flooded with friend requests from women who allegedly have nude pictures of themselves. You just have to click on a link to get the goodies. I’m pretty sure those things are just spyware in thongs and the link will give your computer a virtual STD.

Coincidentally, while working on this blog post, a longtime friend whom I mostly communicate with through MySpace announced that he’s permanently moving to Facebook. His motivation? Ads that say “Date Married Men” and “Women Looking for an Affair.” I’m sure they’re as fake as Akon’s criminal record, but it’s the principle that bothers him. Can’t blame him.

Ah well. Guess that means I’ll be switching to Facebook permanently at some point. But for now, I’ll be filling out those surveys alone. I’m sure the MySpace Prostitutes will keep me company.



  1. im lil sick of myspace and facebook! i think im just getting old and could care less who i keep up with these days. i mean what happened to the good ol days when you just picked up the phone and called an old friend!

  2. This was funny. I have to say that I signed up for a MySpace page and got uninterested so quickly that I cancelled it a month later. However, I was hooked on FB almost instantly.

    One HU-GE problem I have with FB is that everyone who even met you at one point in your life wants to be your friend! I don’t like that. I love FB because it helps me connect with my old and current friends (not I went to middle school with you acquaintances). I agree with Merch that picking up the phone is best, but it takes so long to catch up when you haven’t talked to the person in a while. I can communicate with everyone simultaneously, and I love it.

    I also have to say thank you for this blog. I have just decided to go and delete anyone that I’m not truly friends with. Why do I need all those “friends” that I don’t even speak to.

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